Tamsyn was more than a dog, she was a force of nature, a protector, a teacher, and my unwavering companion. She was a superhero, and I was lucky enough to be her sidekick. I always feared the day she’d have to leave me, but somehow I never truly believed it would come. And then, it did. I still remember the day we met. I had told the rescue not to show me any German Shepherds, I’d been attacked by a few as a kid, and the fear ran deep. But Tamsyn didn’t care about that. She escaped her kennel three separate times while I was searching for the “right” dog. And each time, she ran straight to me, wiggled her way between my legs, sat down, and tilted her head back against me to look up into my eyes with this incredible depth and care. It was as if she was telling me, “There’s no decision to be made. I’m yours, and you’re mine. Don’t be afraid, I will love you well.” She chose me with absolute certainty. She never tried to escape from anything again after that, like she was where she wanted to be so there was no point.

Tamsyn wasn’t a cuddler nor did she enjoy being petted much, she loved her space, but she would sit at my feet, facing me, eyes full of love and loyalty. Her caring gaze felt like being wrapped in ten hugs at once. She was a goofy and graceful girl. Independent, empathic, wise, and hilariously clumsy. A derpy bendynosed beauty who played frisbee like a princess, dusting off the thing before ever putting it in her mouth and bringing it back to me, barking if I took too long to throw it again. She loved music too, but she loved my bestie even more and preferred their music to any band on the radio. Anytime they played the guitar she’d be at their feet, ears pressed to the monitor, listening intensely to every chord struck and shining those lovey eyes on them in encouragement to keep playing.

Over the last year she started this odd little habit of leaving the room for a while, then coming back over and over, like she was training me for what life would be like when she was finally gone. Preparing me, in her gentle way because she knew how hard I would take her absence. I miss her more than words can ever express. I hope she knows how deeply I love her, how grateful I am for every moment we’ve shared. She changed my life and I will never forget her.

Thank you, Tamsyn, for choosing me, for loving me even when at the beginning I had so much to learn in order to be a good mommy, thank you for everything. I love you always and forever.